Rape victims should seek support, help

By Martin Nguyen

It was not until I had come to Santa Clara that I was introduced to the realities of rape.

I knew that it happened, but I had not a shred of knowledge as to what extent. More surprisingly, I learned that the perpetrator is usually not the stranger that lurks in the darkness, but a close acquaintance or a friend from down the hall. It wasn't until I was confronted with such a situation that I began to really think about what should be done; after all, it was now a personal matter. Said bluntly, my friends who have been raped already outnumber the reported statistics.

I began reflecting on my experiences and reached a few conclusions. First, 80 percent of rape victims know their assailants. These are significant-others, friends, relatives, dates and authority figures. I have also seen that rape is more likely to be committed against college-aged women.

This is understandable given that parties are the scenes for many assaults coupled with the fact that alcohol plays a major role in rape. Secondly, the emotional response can be one of fear, shame, anger, sudden and severe distrust, or detached calm � it varies from person to person. Many times, the survivor's fear of reprimand will be the factor that prevents the offense from being reported, making rape one of the most underreported crimes.

After all the protocol of my experiences with rape was said and done, I realized another disturbing fact concerning the aftermath: many do not know what to do after they have been sexually assaulted. As we are all aware that one of the first parties to be contacted for most other crimes would be the police or Campus Safety, the same does not seem to hold true in the case of rape. Any shred of control over one's life has been stolen, leaving hurt and confusion. Perhaps the last thing a victim wants is to bring the "proper authorities" into the situation, which could inadvertently be detrimental to the victim. In fact, rape survivors are usually in a state of shock after the assault, which can last hours or even days. Victims are unsure about what to do and whom to tell, if anyone.

If you feel that you are a victim of rape (sexual intercourse by force, threat, or when unable to make a rational and conscious decision), first realize that it was not your fault. No one desires to be raped. The act is more a statement of the perpetrator's lack of stability. You may feel "used" and "dirty" but it is advisable to not shower or change your clothes (which would do away with any evidence) and immediately go to a hospital where a SART (Sexual Assault Response Team) nurse will advise you with regard to evidence gathering and reporting.

For instance, testing of diseases taken from samples of clothing. If you choose, a police officer can then interview you. This process is done so that taking legal action in the future can be a possibility. That is, the collecting of evidence does not mean you must pursue a legal case even though it is an important option to maintain. It is difficult to think rationally in such a situation but I urge anyone that has fallen prey to such an event to carry out the aforementioned procedures within 72 hours of the incident. As more time passes, the chances that any substantial evidence will be collected decrease rapidly.

In many cases, there are two reasons why no legal action takes place against an assailant. One, the victim does not want to go through the process. Two, there is a lack of evidence to charge the offender. It would be a shame to later decide to take legal action only to be shot down by a lack of evidence that could have been easily collected. But if you do not get a chance to see a SART nurse, it is still possible to collect evidence such as witnesses and filing a report. You can file a report through the police department, Campus Safety, Cowell Health Center or the counseling center. This would not only provide a safeguard against faulty accusations but also provide more options, thus more power, to the victim.

Many survivors of rape find some sort of support group extremely helpful in the process of recuperation and dealing with a very delicate experience. Counseling and support networks are both offered by the university. If someone comes to you who has been raped, the best thing to do is listen. Victims of rape are not alone and should not have to carry the burden alone either. Do this person a favor and provide options so that their own decisions can be made thus empowering them with choice. Ask questions that help the victim assess what has happened and gauge what needs to be done instead of questions that will put someone on the defensive. The initial anguish can last up to a year and beyond and is never forgotten. Survivors have strength and healing capacity, and although it may take time and be difficult, every survivor can move through an individual process and recover from sexual assault. Options and support are key to healing and can be provided by trusted individuals and support groups. Remember that rape happens - to people you know and by people you know.