The Maximalist

What does community look like in college? I think it means different things for all of us, but the common denominator should be the ability to be vulnerable with the group. I know this is not easy for many of you–including myself. 

As a child, the people that I looked up to always seemed to lead perfect lives. They were always happy, never insecure and didn’t seem to have a worry in the world. For one reason or another, I developed the false impression that outward facing confidence or success is really what matters.

This–at times–translated to me rarely being vulnerable with friends, family and coworkers at times. Always projecting happiness and upbeat vibes just became a habit.

Now that I have the wisdom of a senior, I recognize more than ever that vulnerability is a key part of creating a community. Not to mention that lacking vulnerability with those closest to you leads to some level of inauthenticity. The most inspiring leaders, bosses, friends and family members that I know share what their lives are actually like, not just the perfect life that they sometimes live. 

My favorite supervisor of all time (and I’ve had a few) was honest about how she dealt with imposter syndrome and how she approaches solving complex business issues. More traditional managers may put on a “game face,” but her vulnerability enabled me to trust her more and made the internship that much more meaningful. But most importantly, she inspired me to–at times–be vulnerable to others in a work setting. 

College is a time of immense change; you no longer have family and old friends with whom you can share personal details. And creating a community of colleagues and friends around you takes time. It seems obvious now, but vulnerability is the best policy. It’s hard at first–and it’s a skill that I am still working on–but it is worth it.